Kirk

“I broke my wife's nose, spent 67 days in jail with alcohol being brewed under my bunk, and never touched it — something had finally changed inside me after 38 years of addiction.”

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What they struggled with

Drug addiction Alcohol addiction Incarceration Shame Unforgiveness Relationship breakdown Anger

False refuges

Alcohol Drugs Sexual behaviour

What this story reveals about God

Relentless pursuit Patience Restorer Faithful to his word Father's heart Mercy

Religious background

Protestant Christian

Main testimony theme

Deepening Faith

Secondary theme

Deliverance and freedom

How they came to faith

Hitting rock bottom Relational influence

Content advisory

Before you watch

This testimony contains domestic violence, decades of addiction including crack cocaine, multiple incarcerations, and a marriage brought to the edge of destruction. What makes it worth watching is not the wreckage but the specificity of how God held together what Kirk did everything to destroy — including a marriage God had spoken over before it began.

What this story teaches

People can know about God for decades and still be running from him — and God will carry them through the running until they are finally ready to stop.

How God moved

The lie Kirk carried

I just knew that I made bad choices — sobriety just didn't come natural to me. I didn't know I was an alcoholic; I thought I could manage it if life was good enough.

What Jesus showed him

Kirk believed he simply 'made bad choices' and that sobriety didn't come naturally to him — he never grasped the depth of his alcoholism or that he had been dragging the Holy Spirit through every dark place he went, treating as ordinary what God had called him to protect.

Go Deeper

Meet the Holy Spirit. I couldn't have forgiven myself without the Lord. Jesus died on the cross and paid that price already for us. We don't have a right not to accept that. He has already said it is finished. It's done. We can't hold on to it. If you're struggling, seek out help. We can't do this alone. And yes, God can work miracles and he can do all things. But sometimes the Bible teaches us that Jesus, even Jesus, couldn't do miracles in his own hometown. And that wasn't because of Jesus' lack. Just like my needing Alcoholics Anonymous and not God alone wasn't because of God's lack. It was because of mine. If you're struggling and you're hurting, seek out help. Don't sit there alone. Don't think that you got this cuz we don't. But Jesus does.

People can know about God for decades and still be running from him — and God will carry them through the running until they are finally ready to stop.

What you can take from this

If you have been trying to get sober or free on willpower alone, this week find one meeting, one group, or one person who has been where you are — because Kirk's story shows that community is not a supplement to God's work, it is often the vehicle for it.

Progressive entrapment

Started with beer at 12, added drugs at 14, cocaine to stabilize alcohol in high school, crack cocaine relapse after 9 years sober. 'My drug of choice was simply more. It didn't matter what it was, where it was, or how it was. Once I touch alcohol, all bets are off.'

Self-condemnation cycle

Even after sobriety, Kirk describes looking in the mirror and crying, feeling repentant for the person he had been — unable to forgive himself for what he had done to his wife and family. 'I couldn't have forgiven myself without the Lord.'

Family weaponisation

Rather than quit drinking, Kirk tried to bring his wife into his addictions. 'I tried to bring my life into my actions.' He dragged his God-given wife into cocaine and alcohol use, nearly destroying the marriage God had ordained.

1

While I was in jail, I committed myself, I was done. I could not believe I had hurt my wife. That was like a bridge too far. Something had changed inside of me and I knew that I was done.

2

Alcoholics Anonymous was what worked for me. All the treatment centers didn't. I stuck with the meetings I was going to in Alcoholics Anonymous.

3

My wife and I had gotten remarried. We had renewed our vows. He redeemed our relationship.

Matthew 28:19

Kirk references the Great Commission — 'make disciples of all men' — as the first commission God gives, though his personal mission was different.

Deuteronomy 28:13

Kirk quotes 'you're the head and not the tail, above and not beneath' as what the mirror speaks back to him in his repentance.

Matthew 13:57–58

Kirk references Jesus being unable to do miracles in his hometown — used to explain why God alone wasn't enough without the fellowship of AA.

Matthew 19:6

Kirk quotes 'what God has joined together, let no man put asunder' about his marriage to Wanida.

Romans 6:23

Kirk repeatedly references 'the wages of sin' — he deserves them but Jesus paid them for him.

John 19:30

'It is finished' — Kirk quotes this as the basis for self-forgiveness: Jesus already paid the price.

Kirk's Christian Walk

18 years of continuous sobriety. Marriage restored — wife stayed and they renewed their vows. Reconciled with parents and extended family. All seven children know the Lord. Seven children and 23 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. Raising a grandson. Holds stable employment and ministry leadership. No further criminal justice involvement.

He has taken a broken vessel that only death and destruction, and he has patched all the holes in that vessel, and he now uses me to help his lost children.

Alcohol — after assaulting his wife and being jailed, something changed inside him. He spent 67 days in a cell where cellmates brewed alcohol under his bunk and never touched it once.

Alcohol, cocaine, crack, marijuana, mushrooms — my drug of choice was simply more. It didn't matter what it was, where it was, or how it was. Once I touch alcohol, all bets are off. I will do anything, anywhere, with anybody. Womanizing. Rage. I dragged the Holy Spirit through everything I was involved in.

Prayer

The power of Prayer — Probation officer stood in the gap for Kirk.

Kirk's probation officer went to bat for him while he was in jail, compelling the judge not to max him out and instead placing him on electronic home monitoring with access to meetings and church. She later added anger management, domestic violence treatment, and outpatient treatment beyond what the judge ordered — holding him accountable when no one else would. A second bridge was the Christian employer who hired Kirk off the street, took him to church as a condition of employment, reconciled him with his family, and became like a second father to him.

Is today your day?

Yes — I'm Ready

Absolutely, He will.

You don't have to figure everything out right now.

You don't need to have all the answers.

If something stirred in your heart while you were watching or reading — that's not nothing.

That is the Holy Spirit gently knocking on the door of your heart.

Stay right here. There's no rush. The Spirit doesn't pressure or hurry.

Watch another video. Read a little more. Take your time.

When you're ready — even if “ready” just means a little curious — Jesus is ready to meet you.

You don't have to clean up your life first.

You don't have to pass any test.

You only need to say a simple “yes” to Him.

He will take care of the rest.

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

Luke 11:9

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