Talita

“I cursed God out loud, gave away all my Bibles, and dove into the New Age — but God kept drawing me back until one night everything changed and I woke up a different person.”

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What they struggled with

Drug addiction Alcohol addiction Demonic oppression Spiritual warfare (post-conversion)Shame Relationship breakdown Occult involvement Abortion recovery Loneliness / isolation Suicide attempt

False refuges

Drugs Alcohol Searching for love New age Achievement / fitness Religion without relationship

What this story reveals about God

Relentless pursuit Patience Father's heart Defender Restorer Unconditional love

Religious background

Atheism Judaism New Age / spirituality Protestant Christian

Main testimony theme

Secondary theme

Deliverance and freedom

How they came to faith

Supernatural encounter Gradual journey

God accusation

God allowed this to happen to me

Content advisory

Before you watch

This testimony contains rape, drug addiction, domestic abuse, postnatal depression, demonic encounters, and a post-conversion season of suicidal attack — described with honesty but not gratuitous detail. What makes it worth watching is the sheer relentlessness of God's pursuit across fifteen years of running, and the specificity of the supernatural confirmations that finally broke through.

What this story teaches

People can be simultaneously drawn toward God and actively fleeing Him for years — the two are not contradictory. The pursuit and the running can coexist for a very long time before the person stops.

How God moved

The lie Talita carried

I simply didn't feel worthy — I felt like he was too good for me, I wasn't worthy enough.

What Jesus showed her

She had carried unworthiness as her core identity since childhood — never feeling loved, never knowing how to receive love, leaving a good man because she felt he was too good for her, and spending years in reckless self-destruction. The three-night revelations and deliverance prayer broke open the specific lie that she was not worthy of love or a different life.

Go Deeper

People can be simultaneously drawn toward God and actively fleeing Him for years — the two are not contradictory. The pursuit and the running can coexist for a very long time before the person stops.

What you can take from this

If you have been going around the same loop — getting close to God, then pulling back when it costs something — identify the one thing you keep protecting from Him, and this week tell Him honestly that you are afraid to give it up.

Unnamed entity

Repeated sleeping paralysis — woke fully conscious, felt a dark presence pinning her down, unable to move or scream. Occurred multiple times: first on the sofa during her Jewish roots phase, again post-baptism. Released immediately each time she called on the name of Jesus.

Counterfeit spirituality

After cursing God and giving away her Bibles, she dove into New Age — Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer, Silva mind control, Wim Hof, Qigong, self-manifestation. She describes it as 'a very deep and clever deception of the enemy' — convincing her she created her own reality so no one is right or wrong and she could dismiss her genuine divine encounters as self-manufactured.

Counterfeit intimacy

A succession of counterfeit relationships — each one exploiting her weakness for charming, talented, dark men. The Lucifer-obsessed rock singer who told her 'I want your mind, your body and your soul.' The final boyfriend described as 'the refined version of boyfriend number one' — God made it clear the enemy knew her weakness and kept sending a better-packaged version of the same trap.

Core lie

I simply didn't feel worthy — I felt like he was too good for me, I wasn't worthy enough. Rooted in childhood where she never really felt loved and didn't know how to give or receive love. This drove her reckless fearlessness and inability to sustain healthy relationships.

Progressive entrapment

Started with parties and drugs in Israel — cocaine in every cigarette, LSD, ecstasy, weed — escalating to waking in places not knowing her name, taking sleeping pills to balance the drugs, and reaching a suicidal breaking point. In London continued with a drug-dealer boyfriend providing free supply.

Spirit of death

Post-conversion, a voice commanded her to kill herself 24/7 for months — not her own thoughts but an external voice she experienced as coming from outside herself. She describes it as the enemy's final attempt to pull her back after she was saved and delivered.

Self-condemnation cycle

During post-conversion warfare, the enemy planted doubts: 'Did God really say? What if I made a mistake? What if I gave up everything but it's not true?' — the same tactic used with Eve in the garden. She describes it as horrific attacks that kept her in a loop of questioning her salvation.

Isolation pattern

After salvation, God separated her radically — entire Metal Works social world disappeared, relationship ended, fitness business gone. The enemy exploited this season of necessary separation to wear her out through loneliness, inability to eat or exercise, and no social life for months.

1

God if you exist then you need to show it to me because if you're not going to show it to me I'm going to take my life.

2

God I'm so sorry if you are real then you need to make it crystal clear to me because I cannot go through all that stuff again. I need you to help me and to show me the truth and I'm sorry that I walked away from you.

3

I bought my Bible again from WH Smith online. I was very scared to buy that Bible because I knew if I'm gonna buy it probably things are going to happen.

4

Just because of that voice I said yeah, me, I'm going to get baptized.

5

I sent an email to the church saying from next week on the room is available again, I'm not going to teach anymore because God has a different plan in my life. I told him to keep the money.

6

I told him what you and me are doing right here is not okay. I have a vision of a Godly relationship. I want a relationship on God's terms.

7

People started praying on me and there was this lady that started hugging me because she saw in how much pain I was. I must have spent there a good two three hours and the main prayer was that God will set me free and they were asking God to intervene in my life and to help me turn my life around because I on my own human physical power — impossible.

8

I can do nothing without God but I can do everything through Christ and I just need to hand it to him and I can just rest in the Lord. You just lean on him not on your own understanding and he will direct your steps.

Ephesians 1:6

God placed this reference in Talita's mind three nights running; her pastor independently confirmed it before she spoke — the double confirmation broke her open.

Ephesians 6:12

Reading Ephesians 6 revealed to her that she had been in spiritual warfare for seven years — 'you wrestle not against flesh and blood.'

Ephesians 4:22–24

Becoming a new creation in Christ — putting off the old self and putting on the new — described as what the book of Ephesians explained to her about her transformation.

Philippians 4:6

She quotes 'don't be anxious for nothing' as the basis for her current posture of trusting God day by day.

Proverbs 3:5–6

'Lean not on your own understanding, he will direct your steps' — she quotes this as the key to the peace she finally found.

1 Corinthians 10:13

She references 'God will not allow you to be tempted more than what you can bear' during her post-conversion warfare season.

James 1:8

She describes herself as double-minded — one foot in the world, one foot out — referencing the biblical concept directly.

Talita ran from family, lived recklessly in a far country, hit bottom multiple times, and was drawn back by a pursuing Father who met her with joy.

Three consecutive nights of divine revelation that radically reoriented her life parallel Paul's sudden, total reversal on the Damascus road.

She woke up a different person; the old life was radically removed and she understood herself as a new creation in Christ.

A life of accumulated death — rape, addiction, abuse, suicidal despair — breathed back to life by God's sovereign intervention.

Post-conversion months of intense enemy attack that could not destroy her — God present in the fire, delivering her through rather than from it.

The accusation

God allowed this to happen to me

What they said

“What do you want from me? I'm doing all this thing, I'm telling you all the time, everything you're telling me I'm doing it — going to the church, I got baptized, I'm praying, I don't know, everything is going wrong.”

How God answered

God revealed through three consecutive night revelations and a pastor's independent confirmation that the warfare was real, the idols had to go, and full surrender — not partial obedience — was required. Walking out of the church after deliverance prayer, the cloud lifted and she felt total freedom.

Resolution

Fully resolved in testimony

Talita's Christian Walk

Delivered from weed, alcohol, and fornication — all stopped immediately. Labor-pain cramps that had plagued her for six months vanished. Harassing neighbour moved out. Secular music replaced entirely by worship music. Stopped dressing provocatively. Stopped smoking weed. Found genuine joy and peace for the first time. Daughter thriving in faith.

That night everything changed because I woke up a different person.

weed, alcohol, the labor-pain cramps that had lasted six months, the desire for secular music, and the compulsion to attend Metal Works — all gone immediately after walking out of the deliverance prayer session

I was delivered of so many things — the weed was gone, the alcohol was gone, these cramps that I had these labor pains for like a good six months they were gone, I couldn't listen to secular music anymore, my friends from Metal Works disappeared, the neighbor moved out. A heavy dark cloud that was following me all my life just fell off.

Prayer

The power of Prayer — pastor stood in the gap for Talita.

The pastor at her local church invited her to Sunday services at the playgroup. Later, before she could speak in his office, he told her God had placed two things on his heart while praying in his car — a spiritual issue with her boyfriend, and Ephesians 1:6 — the exact scripture God had given her three nights running. This independent confirmation broke her open and she surrendered fully that night.

Is today your day?

Yes — I'm Ready

Absolutely, He will.

You don't have to figure everything out right now.

You don't need to have all the answers.

If something stirred in your heart while you were watching or reading — that's not nothing.

That is the Holy Spirit gently knocking on the door of your heart.

Stay right here. There's no rush. The Spirit doesn't pressure or hurry.

Watch another video. Read a little more. Take your time.

When you're ready — even if “ready” just means a little curious — Jesus is ready to meet you.

You don't have to clean up your life first.

You don't have to pass any test.

You only need to say a simple “yes” to Him.

He will take care of the rest.

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

Luke 11:9

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